Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I wish i was in the wii world.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Randomize
