lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
