Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
