used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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