On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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