If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
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btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
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I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
COCAINE IS GR8
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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