OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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