You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
should my penis look like a turkey
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
