is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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