'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
