you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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