Texts From Last Night

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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.

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  (403): let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length. http://tfl.nu/s8ds
  Replies (41) Good night (711) Bad night (6992)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.

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  (802): I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase. http://tfl.nu/kajo
  Replies (22) Good night (6473) Bad night (796)
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  (607): View more from New York

  please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already

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  (607): please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already http://tfl.nu/5kxb
  Replies (8) Good night (2950) Bad night (1517)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre

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  (303): im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre http://tfl.nu/07ct
  Replies (10) Good night (2032) Bad night (1196)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne

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  (360): last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne http://tfl.nu/35hl
  Replies (8) Good night (2339) Bad night (511)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.

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  (850): I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again. http://tfl.nu/731o
  Replies (10) Good night (1057) Bad night (1545)
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  (916): View more from California

  I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay

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  (916): I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay http://tfl.nu/vfh5
  Replies (13) Good night (1062) Bad night (2169)
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  (607): View more from New York

  I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.

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  (607): I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight. http://tfl.nu/mq74
  Replies (14) Good night (2382) Bad night (480)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.

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  (503): He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain. http://tfl.nu/zlsy
  Replies (2) Good night (1159) Bad night (421)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.

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  (608): Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe. http://tfl.nu/0d36
  Replies (4) Good night (396) Bad night (697)
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  (607): View more from New York

  I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.

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  (607): I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs. http://tfl.nu/nmbl
  Replies (4) Good night (960) Bad night (400)
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  (650): View more from California

  The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad

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  (650): The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad http://tfl.nu/ulr7
  Replies (7) Good night (679) Bad night (1132)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."

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  (386): I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount." http://tfl.nu/nxe2
  Replies (5) Good night (2839) Bad night (535)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.

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  (337): Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment. http://tfl.nu/4czr
  Replies (2) Good night (802) Bad night (419)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.

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  (989): Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams. http://tfl.nu/vuk2
  Replies (4) Good night (462) Bad night (211)

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