I'd wear matching sweaters with you
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
