Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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