We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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