We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize