I got her a Nickelback box set.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
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