I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
