Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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