I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
