at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I accidentally burped into my bong.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
