She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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