Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize