Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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