Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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