Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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