so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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