Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
