chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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