I hate all girls vehemently.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
