He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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