i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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