Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
how does that bad decision feel?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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