...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize