Have you finally orgasmed yet?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize