haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
