WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
