You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
