YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
You took a bar mat shot.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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