I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
