No awkward lesbian experiences without me
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize