quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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