I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i will never coherently bang her
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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