I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize