i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
