The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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