i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
