Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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