New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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