Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them

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  (415): u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them http://tfl.nu/vc7z
  Replies (43) Good night (3873) Bad night (819)
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital

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  (416): Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital http://tfl.nu/9amh
  Replies (5) Good night (4121) Bad night (787)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!

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  (732): i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!! http://tfl.nu/t5uq
  Replies (80) Good night (7705) Bad night (2836)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.

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  (206): Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order. http://tfl.nu/s8w4
  Replies (4) Good night (3340) Bad night (1035)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.

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  (302): just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach. http://tfl.nu/5cxr
  Replies (3) Good night (2857) Bad night (834)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.

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  (765): He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube. http://tfl.nu/tf6d
  Replies (2) Good night (2141) Bad night (731)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?

  (206): View more from Washington

  Adult decisions.

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  (206): Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility? (206): Adult decisions. http://tfl.nu/m22f
  Replies (3) Good night (1978) Bad night (978)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.

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  (859): You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point. http://tfl.nu/cgpy
  Replies (11) Good night (1448) Bad night (663)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....

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  (316): Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips.... http://tfl.nu/9ril
  Replies (3) Good night (1311) Bad night (752)
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  (718): View more from New York

  He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?

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  (718): He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible? http://tfl.nu/fv2h
  Replies (3) Good night (857) Bad night (480)
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  (941): View more from Florida

  do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?

  (727): View more from Florida

  Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.

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  (941): do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party? (727): Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine. http://tfl.nu/yv6f
  Replies (2) Good night (657) Bad night (436)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds

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  (865): I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds http://tfl.nu/ryhj
  Replies (2) Good night (641) Bad night (345)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy

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  (412): There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy http://tfl.nu/mgtm
  Replies (3) Good night (746) Bad night (399)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  So like, boobs.

  (1-616): View more from Michigan

  are you really going to start every conversation like that?

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  (616): So like, boobs. (1-616): are you really going to start every conversation like that? http://tfl.nu/4tw0
  Replies (3) Good night (744) Bad night (317)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.

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  (770): Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money. http://tfl.nu/gg7b
  Replies (1) Good night (665) Bad night (268)

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