guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
And then my night got REAL pukey
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
