Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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